A Confession

written by samantha

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It's been about a week since we arrived in Budapest. God was clearly preparing our hearts far in advance for our stay here, bringing up challenging conversations, a thirst to know His heart, and just an overall openness to perspective change. Quite honestly (for me especially), He is developing the beginnings of a teachable and humble spirit, the start of a shift in how I love people, and the realization that I don't know as much about Him as I thought I did. It's been one of the most difficult, embarrassing, trying, amazing, exciting, and humbling times of my life, and it's only been one week. Oh my gosh, how much our God can do in a week.

We're keeping this blog post short and sweet because God is moving and working and shaping and shifting Capture A Cause, and that's okay. God has used so many people already to give us the same piece of encouragement:

"Leave your expectations at the door and come and see what the Lord has for you."

This is not an easy thing to digest for two people who like to have a plan and know what is going on and what is to come. But goodness, has this been so freeing. Letting go of the pressures and strict schedules has given us the opportunity to accept change when it comes.

So, friends. Where does this leave us and Capture A Cause? We don't know. Our core values are exactly the same and the very same motivation is still there. We have a heart for missionaries, we have a heart to influence the American Church, and we have a heart for the people of Hungary. But we're leaving our expectations at the door. 

  • We don't know how long we will be here.
  • We don't know if we are supposed to go home after this.
  • We don't know if we're supposed to travel somewhere else.
  • We don't know how this will change us.
  • We don't know how this will change Capture A Cause.
  • We don't know if we can or will partner with a larger organization.
  • We don't have a home or job opportunities back in America.
  • We have funds for these next three months, but we have no way to raise support for after that.

And that's okay.

We don't want to pretend like we have it all together and that we don't have some moments where we worry about what to do. We don't have it all figured out, we don't know what is going to happen, and sometimes that is a bit scary. But we have complete peace. Knowing that God takes care of even the birds of the air gives us comfort and assures us that even if we don't know, He does.

/   /   /

"My wealth is in the cross.
There's nothing more I want,
Than just to know His love.
My heart is set on Christ,
And I will count all else as loss.
The greatest of my crowns,
Mean nothing to me now.
For I counted up the cost,
And all my wealth is in the cross."

 
 

Stay tuned! We have MUCH more to come... Things we anticipate, things we're preparing for, and even things we're planning for. But no doubt there is much more lying just beyond our field of view that will blow our anticipations, our preparations, and our plans out of the window along side our pride and our expectations of just how capable we think we are of being used by God.

"For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him."

// Philipians 2:13